Art Gallery Dweller T-Shirts

Rupert was only ever interested in the big picture...

'I wonder where he gets his ideas from?'

Madonna of the Pukes.

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"I think he was a celebrity."

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Personally, I'm a doer."

'Some days I just feel so stuck in a rut that I wish I'd never been invented!'

"Is it me, or is Jasper Johns a genius?" "Über-genius, Larry. Über!"

Painting taking root...

Misunderstood artist

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

'I imagine you'll be asking for a full refund.'

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

"It said this 'Spilt Coffee' series afforded her a lifetime of lattes."

Rodin's Browser

'I just love this work from his macaroni period,'

"Now this I get."

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

'Wow, talk about genius!'

Rodin's Cattle-Grid

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

'Miss Donahue would give him an F.'

The Cremaster Cycle

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

Art Gallery.

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

Sold! For £42,000 to the... No wait - it's the wrong way round!

'He knows everything about art. But he doesn't know what he likes.'