Art Gallery Attendee T-Shirts

Jan Arnolfini and his wife...(it was a boy)

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

'Projectile painting.'

'Miss Donahue would give him an F.'

Art Gallery.

The Cremaster Cycle

"By 'genius' do they mean the artist or the marketing department?"

"I read 'Art News.'"

'How can they call it modern art when it's 100 year's old?'

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

Private Viewing

"I'm not an Antony Gormley, I am Antony Gormley."

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

The less one gets it, the more it's art.

"Do I need to know this stuff to get into medical school?"

"I could do that."

Francoise Gilot

"It's a great work!"

"How did this comma get in with all the pieces?"

'Abstract art is supposed to look that way.' (A rather smarthy attitude in an art gallery)

Understanding art.

"While, yes, I could produce those strokes, I lack the context to position an image in the ongoing conversation of contemporary art as enclosed by capitalist forces."

Jackson Pollock - "Oh no! Someone's thrown paint all over it!"

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

'The artist did this one during his 'I've got no idea' - period.'

Tilted painting

"It's my latest work...I only vomited it this morning."

Tracey Emin's Bed

"I detect an accent – money?"

"You've once said about your work, 'Meow, meow-meow, meeeow.' What did you mean by that?"

"Is that all you can say - 'It's not messy'?"

"Apparently he only uses fugitive colours."

"Is this 'pollocks'."

"This was his real breakthrough piece."

Kid see shadow from mom as mom see shadow in painting.