Art Gallery Goer T-Shirts

'This picture appears to paint only 2 words.'

'I'm not cut out for this job' (Matisse sketch to cut out paper model)

'Abstract art is supposed to look that way.' (A rather smarthy attitude in an art gallery)

"That's not one of the candidates - they're sandbags in case of flooding."

Damien Hirst Detail

Art Gallery - Comics.

Wow

Gift shop

"Yes, I know it looks like a blank canvas. . . I call it apathy!"

"I think that's one of his early 'blank canvases'. I think there are some bigger ones in the next room."

"It's titled 'Coffee Cup Rings' and the prices is $10,000."

"It's Queen Victoria in acrylics."

"This was his real breakthrough piece."

'So what's been stolen?'

"You've once said about your work, 'Meow, meow-meow, meeeow.' What did you mean by that?"

STILL LIVES - 'Only eight o'clock on a Friday night and I'm steaming already!'

'What are you looking at?'

"How did this comma get in with all the pieces?"

"I'm expected to write a good review of this stuff... So here I go with some confusing art rhetoric."

"Derivative? Of what?"

"Thirty years of accounting and I haven't had one 'happy accident.'"

Larry's used art

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

'It's a Joan Biro.'

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"Well....I could've done this!"

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

'Projectile painting.'

'Some days I just feel so stuck in a rut that I wish I'd never been invented!'

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

Jackson Pollock: abstract; Picasso: cubism; Bobby: eight year old

Rodin's Browser

Cats at private view

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."