Army Supplier Gifts

Remounts for the Yeomanry

Great Bargain

Servicemen.

Swiss army hospital...'scalpel...'

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

How the US Succeeded in Afghanistan

"It's the kind of missile system that says, 'Hey, these peace negotiations aren't really going very well.'"

'Democracy, okay?'

"Worst budget cuts ever!"

Larry was always invited on camping trips because of his ice chest

Hello, you've reached the private line of the Secretary of Defense. At last! We tried calling you all day yesterday to alert you to an imminent threat. How did you get this number? It was coming straight at your nation-state at speeds approaching Kebin 2. What are you talking about? What's "Klebin 2"? Apologies. In earthlingese that would be "mach 23," or 24.140.16 kilometers per hour. Good lord! I'd better wake ... Not to worry. Our sensors locked on to it as soon as it launched from your North

The Appearance of the Gatling Machine-Gun in 1864 caught the world by surprise.

"Today U.S. Defense Industry stocks rose on news Dick Cheney endorsed Donald Trump."

How To Cut The Defense Budget

"Tell Congress we need a super duper hypersonic missile."

"We don't see ourselves as either a David or a Goliath. We're content to just be the company that manufactures the sling shots."

Tank. Building this vehicle will create jobs and stimulate growth! He's given new meaning to the phrase "The economy's in the tank"!

F&E Submarine Contractors. When we ask the government for assistance, we should avoid calling it a "bailout."

European Arms Proliferation - 1860's

"Ah, Master Turnip, I see you're on a defence contract too!"

Robo Sapiens

The House Always Wins

'Iraq had no WMD's? Iran has no nukes? Surely there must be some terror-producing country to keep Americans frightened, and in support of big defense spending!'

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

Arms Industry increases sales by 8.5%

Cyberwarfare

Karen was delighted that both her large and small suppliers had turned up for her industry day

'I know it doesn't look like much, but have you ever been shot in the face with a p****d off cat?'

Bomb Back Better

"Tell me again. Do we weaponize, then monetize, or the other way around?"

'Being a Drill Sergeant isn't s tough - all you got to know is how to count to four.'

'Hey, boys, I wouldn't tease the guerrillas - they will shoot.'

'What's wrong, people? You wanna be sooper-dooper safe, don't you?'