Armchair Historians Gifts

''Star Trek,' or 'The Waltons' I could understand... but a 'Geraldo' marathon?'

Genghis Khan, master of the Mongolian steps.

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

The intellectual.

Inside One's Memory Bank

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

The Evolution Of Man.

Arthur Schopenhauer

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

"De l'huile bouillante, pas du fromage fondu!"

"Plagiarist!"

"That's my dad back when he was, like, militarized."

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

The Brief collaboration Alfred Nobel And Thomas Edison

'Are we watching business news or sports news?'

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

'Let your people go? - after all the trouble I went to getting them full employment?'

'Which channel would you like to tut at tonight?'

'Under blood type, sir, could you be a little more specific than blue?'

"We're at the Grand Marina Hotel in Barcelona. Some sheepdog you turned out to be."

'One advantage of living through the plagues and wars of the 14th century was that you didn't have to study Chaucer.'

"Don't you sometimes worry that if they do give us our stuff back we'll lose some of the sense of grievance that's so crucial to our cultural identity?"

The first 'outside the box' thinker.

Harcourt's Defeat in 1895 Election

Mozart eating noodles.