Armchair Appreciator Gifts

You know you're getting old when....

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

American Idle.

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

'This chair ain't big enough for the both of us.'

'After researching our dream vacation online with reviews, commentaries, we cams and pictures, we felt we'd been there and didn't need the trip!'

Travelogue

Donald Trump Tells a Joke...

"Attention, everyone! I'd like to introduce the newest member of our family."

"They remove people who have become 'jammed in armchairs' due to COVID 19 lockdown!"

"Pretty cushy, am I right?"

'She's not very good. She only did three revolutions and her air wasn't all that much.'

"Just the slippers is fine!"

'Magnolia, Michaelangelo, the ceiling was meant to be magnolia!'

Big business is not evil

After 9pm Harry Lomax slips quietly into cruise control.

"Yeah, and the new job lets me work from home."

'Which channel would you like to tut at tonight?'

'Are you guys still watching the tapestry? Why don't you go outside it's such a nice day!'

"We're at the Grand Marina Hotel in Barcelona. Some sheepdog you turned out to be."

Saguaro Cacti.

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

Reading room

"C'mon, Hillary – just answer the question!"

'Perhaps this will give you inspiration son?'

Introverted Chair

Skier.

"Careful... if you look too comfortable they take your chair away."

Reserved Parking

"While you were on vacation, Zooker, a motion was made and seconded to saw five and a half inches off your chair legs."

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

'Helen! I'm all settled in and I don't want to get up. Would you get the remote for me?'

Shaker furniture: The flamboyant years.

'...if you look at it in the right way it begins to make sense.'