Aristocratic Lifestyle Enthusiast Gifts

"f- f- f- fiddlesticks!"

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

REPENT! Get back to nature

"Life is beautiful, and it's messy."

"The Duke and Duchess of A.T. & T., the Count and Countess of Citicorp, the Earl of Exxon, and the Marchioness of Avco. The Duke of Warnaco..."

"Can any of us truly see ourselves?"

"China Ministry of State Security Royal Infiltration Training Unit"

"Living underground is not what it used to be."

"Miss Penny to inquire about the tardiness of evening kibble."

Duchess

'Is the poodle of the house in?'

"Her ladyship isn't in—wait, yes, no—so sorry, she's out."

"That's Fred. He was raised by bats..."

"I'm getting something to speed things up, Jenkins. A skateboard."

"It's said to be haunted by the ghost of the fifth earl, who fell on hard times."

"So what are you the earl of?"

'What are they, men or women? I don't know, they're not wearing clothes.'

The Nobility Scooter

"I lost 5 pounds and you didn't even notice!"

A cavalier gentleman.

A House of Lords Reform: 'Please do not take shotguns or dead game into the chamber.'

View Down Ladies' Mile

'One day this will be someone else's.'

Marriage a la Mode - Breakfast scene.

'Darling, I'll have my coffee in my den...'

Countess

"And on the floor is the present duchess...."

"Why do all butlers say m' lud at the end of every sentence!"

'It's a vegetarian cave painting.'

Nudist Colony Halloween Parties

"No! No! I said 'virgin', NOT 'vegan' !"

I like him. He makes me almost laugh.

'So, Bjorn, I hear you've gone vegan!'

"Where's the damn bottle-opener?" "It's his day off, sir."

Queen Elizabeth II