Arachnid Appreciator Gifts

Support group therapy for male black widow spiders.

'This is another fine mess, Stanley.'

"Well, you're not itsy-bitsy to me."

Those are some hiccups, Bob.

'Hang onto your socks, Dolly, the fool's half asleep and headed straight for us!'

The last thing they think

A streak of fear ran through the entire town upon Black Widow Bill's return.

The spider does not frighten Little Miss Muffet.

'Hey! I always thought spiders had 8 legs!'

Brown Non-Recluse Spider

What did I tell you about covering your bottom when you sneeze?

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Yeah, it's funny, but you'll see, in this house, it's the guy who screams the loudest...

"No flight of the Bumblebee"

"You can’t just go up the waterspout whenever you hear something you don’t like!"

A violin spider and a saxaphone spider

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

"Whoa, dude. You're talking about the hive mind mentality at this company like it's a bad thing."

Want the wings as an appetizer?

Fly Hospital: "Just a slight stinging then you'll be fast asleep."

Unwelcome guests can be caught and thrown out...there is no need to kill them.

Spider Press-Ups

"It's alright for you, female worms are everywhere, but when was the last time you saw a Mummy-Long-Legs?"

'For Godsake,Archie! Will you just stop hovering!'

"Of all my husbands I believe the first one tasted the best."

I was coughing, Frank - I didn't need the Heimlich.

Leonard Nimoy

"It was a slow day - my pedometer says I only put in 1, 273, 426 steps."

Blatant competition in nature.

"Now, cover your second, fourth and seventh eyes and read the next line."

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

Fly Club Singer: 'Wherever I Lay My Eggs, That's My Home...'

"Arachnophunnies"

Black Widow Diet

"What do I remember about my mother? Well, for starters, she was delicious."