Aquarium Artists Gifts

"Have you been upsetting the dog again, Leo?"

Horror movies

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Piranhaclaus

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

"I think it loves us."

'I wish I was creative'

"Just water for me, please."

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

"This aquarium is such a nice prison."

'Twitter for goldfish.'

'I'm tired of this bread and water diet.'

Goldfish evolution - "...it's called evolution and it means in a few years we'll walk right out that door."

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

'So what have you been up to?'

'As I grow older and I reflect back on it, I'm kind of sorry we ate all the kids!'

"I think we are overfeeding the fish!"

"We have to get out of here! They're saying boil ALL water!"

"After we bought the aquarium, the pump, gravel, grass and heater, we couldn't afford any fish."

'...and another thing - why do I always have to sleep in the wet spot?'

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

'You've been rearranging the furniture again, haven't you?'

"We'll go out for a quiet candlelight dinner, slowdance on the beach to the music of Barry White, then make love in a warm, cozy bed!"

'I haven't been able to go to sleep in this new bowl.'

Taking goldfish for a walk.

Pet Store: Clown Fish.