Aquarium Artists Gifts

"Have you been upsetting the dog again, Leo?"

Horror movies

Piranhaclaus

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

"I think it loves us."

"Just water for me, please."

'I wish I was creative'

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

"This aquarium is such a nice prison."

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

'So what have you been up to?'

Goldfish evolution - "...it's called evolution and it means in a few years we'll walk right out that door."

'I'm tired of this bread and water diet.'

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

'As I grow older and I reflect back on it, I'm kind of sorry we ate all the kids!'

"After we bought the aquarium, the pump, gravel, grass and heater, we couldn't afford any fish."

"We have to get out of here! They're saying boil ALL water!"

Taking goldfish for a walk.

"I think we are overfeeding the fish!"

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

'I haven't been able to go to sleep in this new bowl.'

'You've been rearranging the furniture again, haven't you?'

'...and another thing - why do I always have to sleep in the wet spot?'

"We'll go out for a quiet candlelight dinner, slowdance on the beach to the music of Barry White, then make love in a warm, cozy bed!"

'Mother was right... You never take me anywhere!'