Aquarium Adviser T-Shirts

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

Boy bringing home an octopus in a fish bowl.

"I have to refill it everyday. He has a tendency to retain water."

"We’re a lending aquarium."

Pets.

A Preschool of Fish

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

"I think it loves us."

'I wish I was creative'

"I'd love to help out but I'm barely keeping my head below water now."

"Just water for me, please."

"Well, this isn't really going anywhere if you don't like public displays of affection."

"Guide to physical comedy fish"

"Lap fish..."

"Please, Al. You know the backstroke scares the children."

'Don't you have a better escape plan than that?'

Bottle-nosed Dolphins.

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

Octopus Puppet Show (colour)

"I wish someone would come and turn the vibrating buzzer off on that mobile phone!"

'Too bad we're not pay-per-view.'

'So what have you been up to?'

'As I grow older and I reflect back on it, I'm kind of sorry we ate all the kids!'

"Well look who's waiting with bated breath!!"

"We have to get out of here! They're saying boil ALL water!"

'...and another thing - why do I always have to sleep in the wet spot?'

'I'm trying to toilet train them.'

"We'll go out for a quiet candlelight dinner, slowdance on the beach to the music of Barry White, then make love in a warm, cozy bed!"

'The 79 cent fish ate the $2.50 fish - shall I charge him $3.29 for it now?'

Welcome to Landworld.

Pet Store: Clown Fish.

'Mother was right... You never take me anywhere!'

"Wow, look at him go! He's done 900 press-ups easy!"

"Do you think there's life out there?"

'The worst part is not to give birth, but to remember all their names!'