Aquatic Advisor T-Shirts

"His therapist told him to get out more."

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

Fish that snore, and the tragic lives of those who care.

Water Gardening: One thing is certain - you will find the peace and tranquility of water an almost irresistible attraction.

It is essential not to overcrowd a tank as this can cause serious problems...

'So what have you been up to?'

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

"This aquarium is such a nice prison."

"Don't do it - they're trying to beat us at our own game."

'Bad news! More people are switching from red meat to fish!'

The Transition Oz team on their way to Totnes to get advice on Reskilling, Transport, Oil Dependancy and overcoming Post Petroleum Stress Disorder.

"Cat got your tongue?"

"He never takes me anywhere."

'The oceans are vast, yet we never go anywhere!'

Fish Farm.

Dolphin wins the swimming competition.

"Well look who's waiting with bated breath!!"

The Threat to the Environment

Fish Food

"You'd like a second opinion? Okay, I think you should stay off the furniture too."

"Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose."

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

School of Fish

If swimming is such a good way to lose weight, how do you explain whales?

"He put up a decent fight."

'Don't fight it, Fred - Just go with the flow.'

Spawning did nothing for Maurice and Kevin.

'And every spring, a koi pond shows up in a corner of the basement.'

'The food's lousy! The water's too cold! The pond needs cleaning! You should feed us more often!'

"I can clearly see from the colour of your rings that your have some anger issues...!"

"How goes the farm-raised salmon?"

'Well, I don't care how you did it at home, Walters, this is not how we handle this sorta thing at seaworld...'

"It's true that the basement's flooded, but it's stocked."

'Look at that spread. Some fish have it so good.'

Rescuing the Fish in the Flood