Appliance Repair Gifts

"Some of your lost socks were clogging up the motor."

"You're right, Doris - it was made in India."

"Well, if I were you, I'd first watch a couple YouTube videos, then I'd screw it up."

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

The world's most unemployable family

"That's the last time I ask you to fix anything around here!"

"Here’s your problem. This isn’t a ‘Franklin’ stove, it’s a ‘Voltaire.’"

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

'Drat - the water purifier is on backwards.'

Moe's Fix-It Shop - No Heroic Measures

'I was walking past the washers and dryers and one of my socks disappeared.'

"Can you weaken the spring or something? -- It keeps knocking my coffee over."

'Of course, the self-cleaning models tend to cost a little more.'

'So you just dry stuff? That's cool, I guess. I mean, it's not like there's some mystical force that could do that for you, like, I don't know... evaporation.'

When it came to appliance repairs...Joe wasn't one to mince his words!

'Wow, that really was concentrated dish soap.'

'It's just some 'Stir 'n' Blend', 'Bake 'n' Slice', 'Mix 'n' Broil', Chop 'n' Simmer and 'Pour 'n' Serve.'

"Look at it this way -- in three years your roof could leak."

'I think I've found our overload.'

'You say your picture's funny?...I'm surprised you got a picture at all. That's a microwave oven!'

'Got any changing rooms to try this one on?'

'Why can't you guys be more like the hot water heater, who may pay for itself in two years.'

'Maybe I shouldn't put 'instant cooling' on maximum.'

'Hand over all your money or the toaster gets it!'

Dellson's refrigerator door seal repairs.

'Of course, the one you buy would be upright. This is just the floor model.'

'Is there any way of keeping the light one when you're inside?'

'Why, now, my refrigerator isn't running. Who is this?'

"Uh-Oh, a piece of cardboard got sucked into the dryer. . . Can't we just stick something in there?"

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."