App-loving Counselor Pillows

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

"I recommend that you two find a way to spice up your shelf life."

'I prefer the term 'whistleblower' to tattletale.'

"Freud doesn't work for you, so I', going to try some Dr. Anthony Fauci..."

"You're completely screwed up."

'Mona Lisa, would it make you happy if I gave you a foot massage every night?'

"There! Now we're getting somewhere."

"I just feel like I'm constantly disappointing parents everytime I appear on report cards."

"Tell me more about your imposter syndrome."

Feel alienated by technology? Tell me more. Press 1 for yes, 2 for no.

Personal Relationship Counsellor

'Typical bloody man, you've no idea what loyalty means...it's just self, self...self!'

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

'So, when did you first realise that you fancied me rotten?'

"The words 'complete screwball' are not in my vocabulary."

Man Gives Computer Therapy/

'My wife doesn't understand me.'

'... And, don't worry about his future. I'm sure my Son will give him a job, when they grow up.'

"Last week, when I was telling you about my Lou Ferrigno dream, were you fighting off a yawn? Do you go to therapy? What would you do if I touched your ear? Yes or no—am I insane?"

'It's not just his insane jealousy - he also insists on choosing all my clothes.'

'I know we're supposed to be Lovebirds, but a bit of privacy from time to time would be nice...'

Weight of the world on your shoulders.

"He doesn't like dinosaurs."

End of world nigh!!!

'I think Mr. Teddy's getting too dependent on me.'

'Do you ever communicate as a family by just speaking?'

That's my diagnosis. If you want a second opinion, I will ask my Smart Phone

'It's all right. You're allowed to get up on this couch.'

'I thought being married to a rodeo clown would be more fun.'

Early career fair