Anxiety Humor Aficionado Gifts

"Well, the MRI confirms it: you have a shy bladder."

'Apparently, Smith's desk just couldn't withstand the weight of the paperwork we piled on his desk.'

'I've been a nervous rex all day.'

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

Some scents are nonsense.

Newfangled contraceptions phobia: 'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

"My problem is I obsess over whether I worry enough."

Agoraphobic Explorer

'Has the news finished yet?'

"Did we turn off the stove?"

"Since I heard there was a monster I can't sleep at night!"

"A mouse! A mouse!"

Safe harbour

"He's socially awkward but brilliant in his field."

'Dinner for two, table for seven.'

"I sleep poorly anyway, so you might as well put me in high-risk investments."

"The feel of mud and weeds between my toes just really freaks me out."

'He has a doctorate in worrying.'

Room 101 Tax Inspection

'And why do you think you developed this overwhelming fear of couches?'

Why hamsters don't sleep at night.

"We look for people who can quickly adapt to changes in the workplace."

Pre-minstrel Tension.

'Hey, it's all right - we're ALL afraid of vacuum cleaners.'

'It's only hypochondria, but it's a very virulent FORM of it.'

People go out of their way to hurt me phobia: 'Believe me, Carpenter, when I fired you I didn't have the faintest idea it was your birthday.'

Bubbie's parrot

"If anything happens, Janice, I love you."

"I knew it. I just KNEW it. How long have I had this condition, doctor? Is there a cure? Oh, God, it just had to be disease, didn't it..." Cathy finds out that she has hypochondria.

Take The Guesswork Out Of Your Diagnoses!

"My apologies, sir. Our chef forgot to take his beta-blocker."

"I think the man in the corner may have the covid."

'I had that nightmare again, where I get eaten by a dog!'