Anxiety Battler Gifts

My inomnia wouldn't be so bad if I didn't lie awake worrying about it.

Office worker with 'Conquer you fear of public speaking' pack containing automatic weapon.

M.D. Of course I keep myself all wound up … Everyone else is busy running me down.

"As a confirmed hypochondriac, I rely on placebos to get me through the day."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

"Class of 2008, never let the excuse 'I can't find my pants' stand in the way of your dreams."

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

Fight or Flight

"Try thinking about something else."

Mind-Fullness

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

That party went well.

"I think I'm having pre-traumatic stress disorder."

Nervous Oral Testing

Now Simon would have nightmares about his mother's failing eyesight.

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

'Now there's a vet that needs a holiday,'

Flu vaccine.

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

"If you're not on the brink of despair you're part of the problem"

"Uh-oh it's happening aain, the feeling I'm being triggered...."

"I'd like to be a shake-it-off kind of person, but I'm more of a cling-to-it-and-focus-on-it-until-it's-irrevocably-weaved-into-my-psyche sort of gal."

The Forever Stamp

Your stress is stress-related.

"Can you recommend a wine that goes well with red meat, Zanex, and Lipitor?"

Some of us are calm on the surface but paddling like crazy underneath, and some of us are just the opposite.

Nervous Student

'He won't eat his lettuce until I've washed it five times. I'm sure his OCD is getting worse!'

A poem: With daylight's shift, winter draws near...

"Do you cover hypochondria?"

'You have a fauxbia.'

Transcend Dental Medication: "Prepare to let go of the pain."

'Don't be nervous but I think we're about to go LIVE on the new system.'