Anti-aging Adventures Gifts

'Too much Botox, Mavis.'

Cats on Board.

Inside One's Memory Bank

"You're in perfect health and look half your age – I'm prescribing something to help you shut up about it."

I said, your bones ache because you’re old. I’m referring you to an archaeologist.

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

Aging Problems

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

'I can't believe I'm pretending to be 55 already...'

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'Hi, I'm middle-age and I'll be hanging around a while.'

You know you're getting older: when your back goes out more often than you do!

"O.K., one last big rhubarb score. But then I'm out of the pie game for good."

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

Wally's dye job...makes his hair look 25 years younger.

"Bear in mind there are three laws in this gym we cannot ignore: health, safety and gravity."

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

'There is a fancy name for your condition...Let's just call it 86 and counting.'

"Try to remember, you're not 70 any more."

'I hate to break this to you, Clark, but your buns of steel have turned to jello.'

"The Doctor says it's very rate for the superannuated to get taller."

"Ha! Now no one can call me 'old'! I just overtook a sports car!"

"Don't worry, I won't hold my age against you."

A man with notches in his nose for his glasses.

"Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade."

'I can't leap tall buildings in a single bound like I used to.'

'Timmy, thirty is the new fifty.'

When Seniors Fly

'Voila!! No more wrinkles!!'

'My doctor's given me the all-clear for our Reunion tour.'

'My Goodness! All these years George and I never guessed you were a superhero.'

The world's most successful beauty blogger...

Optimistic Aging...

"You have the wrinkles of a woman half your age."

Person who refuses to admit age on board. Feel free to drive with wild and reckless abandon.