Annual Report Season Gifts

"No, that's a happy face. I need you to go out there and put on a brave face."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

In basket-case.

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"So, we look to the fourth quarter as a time of healing."

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

Things-to-do-today: Daily workboxes piled up on desk.

21st century water cooler conversations.

"We're experienced an extraordinary amount of growth this year."

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

'Salaries Manager. No.'

What My Day Feels Like

"#Win!"

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

Annual profits,

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

'I had a thought. Let's scrap everything and start a new fiscal year right now.'

"Whereas we used to display losses in shocking and offensive red, we now display them in warm and comforting toasted almond."

The Salesman

"It's time to retire the word 'profit'."

'These are the end of year figures recollected in tranquility.'

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

"In economics, I got an IOU."

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

'If sales don't improve incrementally... our business outlook will change excrementally...'

'Not bad, Ms. Newborn. But take another crack at it, and this time remember that 'earnings-per-share' is the alter upon which all other numbers are sacrificed.'

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

"Before I read the financial report I have to ask... do any of you have a weapon?"

"Good morning Rudy. I suppose you're wondering why I've summond you....It's time for your annual performance review...."

Something tells me it's not going to be a good school report!

"We've had a major development this year that I'm excited to share with the employees."

Business is off the chart.