Animal Trivia Pro Gifts

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"Now our contestant will try to guess which of you is the very last individual of your species."

"Ever eat a bird?"

Funky Facts: Cats

'15% of Americans don't have chairs in their living rooms, and of that 15%, 73% don't even realize it.'

Funky Facts: Turtles.

'There are facts,there are factoids, and there are just plain fun facts.'

Answers to last week's brain-teasers

'I don't know why she says I didn't spend enough time looking for an interesting topic. Aardvarks are interesting.'

'We did a catscan on him and we still don't know why they purr.'

"No, I'm afraid I don't know how much wood a woodchuck could chuck." "We're beavers."

"Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity."

'I'm like you guys only, I s**t ten times my body weight!'

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

Funky Facts: A Baby Koala is called?

Funky Facts: True or false, Seagulls drink both fresh and salt water?

'I told you! One life - That's all they got!'

"At the time of the incident, I was employed in the Dunbar house as a pet."

"Bad dog."

"Look closer, it's right under your beak."

'Does he bite?'

A Mosquito has 47 teeth.

You look tired, Randy. Hot date last night? I had a date. That is correct. But was it hot? A gentleman doesn't tell whether a date was "hot" or not. No … but you usually do. Didn't you just patent "Randy's Hot-o-Meter," the hat that turns from white to pink to red, depending on the hotness of last night's date? Did you know the inventor of bacon was vegetarian? He was? Who knows? Point is, inventions are not a statement of principles.

'You'll find this ideal for brushing the dust off that set of encyclopaedias I sold you last week.'

'I can forgive you, Nichole - but I can never forget.'

Pets past...Did you know?

Look, Ernie, we're in the middle of today's crossword puzzle! Yeah! And over there they want 16 letters for "Alaskan Island Lens Makers. "I've got it! "Optical Aleutians"! And over there! 12 letters for a Jaded Cruise Ship Passenger.. "Man Over-Bored"! Up there! 7 letters for a No-Win, No-Lose situation.. "Dieting"! And 15 letters for a "White Lie". Simple.. A "Bleach of Promise"! I Love these things...they're so easy!

Chicken Nugget

Why snails rarely come to blows - A wise guy, eh! Well, I dare you to come over here and say that.

The natural colour of the flamingo is not pink. Flamingos are coloured by their food; blue-green algae that turns pink when digested.

A chameleon takes on the colour of it's background even if it can't see. A totally blind chameleon placed on a blue cloth still turns blue.

Funk Facts:Cows.