Animal Story Aficionados Gifts

'Ever since I lost that stupid race, I've been a laughing stock wherever I go...'

"Don't be fooled - that's Henrietta, cross-dressing again."

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

"Wait, wait, back up, back up. Who the #!@! is George Orwell?"

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack -- King Of The Commune

"The first thing we have to do is get you up there."

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"After the big race, the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

"Can I hear Goldilocks and the three hares?"

"Stop playing dumb, young man. I wasn't pulled out of a hat yesterday."

'I overheard the farmer say I have a future at McDonalds.'

'If you INSIST upon 'living your character' could you PLEASE stop writing animal stories.'

"Whoever said you can drive a horse to water, but you can't make him drink? (hiccup)

"What the heck? The darn rabbit just disappeared!"

'Then, one day a kid yelled, 'Man, look at that ugly duck with the long neck and the black mole over it's beak.'. To think I spent years parading around thinking I was a swan.'

Aesop's Fables: The Fox and the Crow

'I don't get it. He had the smallest paws in the whole litter.'

'Will I ever catch my tail?'

"You're not leaving until we know everything."

'Look, when you made an appointment for me to treat a rattlesnake bite,...

Cinderella's coach mice needed therapy for many years.

'Yep, I did eat his homework, but he begged me to.'

Anthropomorphic Fiction.

Aesop's Fables - Dog and His Own Reflection

"Well Doc, maybe I'm losing my mind, but last night, as I was howling at the Moo, I could have sworn I saw a cow jumping over it!"

The dove returns to Noah's Ark carrying an olive branch in a martini.

Cow who jumped over the moon with a calf hanging of its udders.

If the mouse hole's a-rockin', don

"He's preaching his 'Clever Hans' theory again!"

"And here with the grizzly details."

"Yes, I know son, I've been through that too: Sometimes, we are resented for being clever..."

'I swear officer: I had just stopped to pull up my socks when the weasel went 'pop'...'

'Remember the plan: on the final stretch, you go down.'

"I told him that whole elephants being afraid of us thing was just a myth. But did he listen? Now look at him. What a putz."

"I came as soon as I heard."