Animal Linguists Gifts

(Woof!) (My word! I believe I'm speaking french!)

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

"Ever eat a bird?"

'Iguana know what time it is.'

"I've never had a bird's eye view of anything."

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

"And here is the very stone that finally enabled us to figure out what all those dogs and cats were saying."

"Actually I never loved you."

'I don't care how smart you think you are, you're still a bird brain.'

"... and the fact that I ain't never caught a rabbit should have no bearing on our friendship."

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."

'He's so clever he's learning a second language!'

Ernie, as a scientist you should say the birds are "making aggressive vocalizations," not "feuding with tweets."

"It's not the walking — it's the waiting."

"I've lived among them my entire life, and I can tell you, 'fetch,' 'roll over,' 'sit,' 'stay,' and 'bad dog,' is the extent of their vocabulary."

"I started out eating homework. Now I shred documents."

Dog-English dictionary.

"Our researchers have discovered that 'E' is the most common, and only, letter in the dolphin alphabet."

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

"Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity."

Barking as a Second Language.

'Do you know something? If I couldn't eat, I would just die!'

'Woof, woof, woof - but I'm paraphrasing.'

"Your work's fine, it's your break time I want to talk to you about."

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

Dog dictionary/Dog Alphabet.

I've been wanting to introduce you to Herbert for months. I didn't want to scare you. Don't be silly. So what if I've discovered my girlfriend has secretly raised a talking gerbil she pampers, gives back rubs to, and debates international politics with. What's so strange about that? So you're good with it. Get me Dr. Phil.

"You taught me to speak, and now that I'm talking to you, you're all freaked out."

"Other end, Steve. We've already met."

'Well, I know the moon is closer.'

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't eat so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much floatsam.'

'Is it true what they say'

"I think my name is 'stop that' but I don't know for sure."

'There is a unique solution to this conundrum,' said the chicken, 'but in order to be sure, I'll need to cross the road.'

'I pose as a concerned citizen, but actually I couldn't miss the golden marmoset if it did become extinct.'