Animal Doctor Duelist Pillows

'You srow ze glove in my face?...'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"Congratulations! It's a bitch!"

"Who's got excellent kidney function, according to this most recent round of tests? You do! Yes, you do!"

Dog in hospital pushes bone-shaped IV,

'Half-time, full-time - It's gone into penalties, woman!'

'Ta dum deedee dum -- DUM -- Bloop -- Fsst, tra la,,,'

An inbred poodle.

"They've decided to resolve the department's conflicting educational philosophies."

"Good news—it's not colon cancer, it's tinsel."

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

'They should have extra-small thermometers for Yorkies, Doctor!'

'The Position's yours, Henderson - But first you must defeat our champion.'

'The nice thing about group practice is that two minds are better than one.'

'Worst case of Prickly-Heat I've ever seen!'

"He's so old I usually let him do what he wants."

Ophiologist

"May I keep my collar on?"

'Naw, man! I ain't never worked in no animal hospital...'

"You'll feel better when you see the doctor."

'$200 for bladder stones? NOW I know what they meant by 'precious stones'!'

'I'll be glad to discuss Pal's itchy skin in my office tomorrow morning, Mrs. Allan!'

"In my practice, I prefer to treat the whole hog."

Desert Vet.

'Nonsense, Melvin! Who ever heard of a tapeworm that big?'

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'No, I'm sorry. I'm Doctor Ford and I do the large animal work....'

Vet checks fish's heartbeat with a stethoscope through fish bowl.

'Doctor, you've removed leg bands before, haven't you?'

'The vet did it.'

"Leave the bowl."

'I don't care if a person would have been treated the same way. This is not a person. This is MY DOG!"

"But You Knew I Was An Animal Doctor!"

"We had him neutered,"