Animal Conversation Wonderer Gifts

"Look closer, it's right under your beak."

"Could you tell me how to get to cedar grove, New Jersey? I want to see where my grandfather was born."

"I've never had a bird's eye view of anything."

"Ever eat a bird?"

"Do you think the birds like me?"

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

"Now, let your inner ‘bad dog’ answer the question ..."

"You know what the Serengeti lacks?—Decent deserts."

"Give it up—Frisbee is your game."

'I don't care how smart you think you are, you're still a bird brain.'

"... and the fact that I ain't never caught a rabbit should have no bearing on our friendship."

"I'm expected for dinner around seven. Other than that I'm completely free."

"It's not the walking — it's the waiting."

'I'm asking for a transfer to California because that's where you get the really good stuff.'

"I started out eating homework. Now I shred documents."

'Oh, I'm not looking for Gold, I'm checking for bear-traps...'

"So, sniffed any interesting butts lately?"

"Yes, he does speak, but only on condition of anonymity."

'Do you know something? If I couldn't eat, I would just die!'

'Woof, woof, woof - but I'm paraphrasing.'

"BOL means Barking Out Loud."

"I could have been man's best friend but who needs the pressure."

"Speaking personally, I haven't had my day, and I've never met any dog who has."

"People are O.K., but I prefer little pieces of string."

That's right: Not only are we 'Man's best friend', but a lot of people are allergic to cats...

"Yeah, I tried beaver once too, but I didn't like the woody after-taste..."

'This dingo penpal of his - they're Australian aren't they?'

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

"What do you think of the new feed?"

"Cool hat, Walter. Where'd you get it?" "It came with the meal."

'Every year it's the same thing. I resolve to lose a ton and you say you're going to control your anger.'