Animal Behaviorist Humor Gifts

'I'm getting cinnamon, brandy nutmeg, a hint of alsation...'

'I would like you to please not tell people I'm a stalker!'

"That should keep him off our backs for a while."

'My bark may be worse than my bite, but I've got a whine that will drive you up a wall!'

Dog looks perplexed as man has his head out the window taking in the beer smells.

"Do me next."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Cat croissant, cat baguette, cat muffin, cat turnover

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Dogs are so silly: Just throw a ball or a stick and they'll chase it and bring it back!'

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

"Yes, it's oil-paint: It's difficult to find water for watercolours around here..."

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

"Well, here's the problem. You been takin' the hair ball pills and givin' the Viagra to the cats."

"The Bruins are down a goal. Do me a favor: Pretend you’re a Boston terrier."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"He's no hat and all corgis."

Snowmobull

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

"Scuba cow"

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

'Jurassic Pork.'

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

"Yes, one is a dog."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

'You've made a powerful enemy'

Hats and Food

"This paw has you meeting a lovely poodle, an enchantress who will win your heart... but look, here, this is telling me she's lousy with fleas."

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

'A representative from Merrill Lynch to see you.'

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

Fish with a human in a bowl.

'I'd like to return this, please.'