Angelic Debater Gifts

"Oh them, They're contrarians."

"Not that it's any of your business, but no, I wasn't kicked out! We had creative differences, that's all!"

'Today's sermon is on Eve and Adam....'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"You seem troubled, Pastor. Is anything worrying you...I mean aside from the sins of the world, the vanity of humankind, man's inhumanity to man..."

"I see you're back from church. What was cherry-picked for you today?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

'Are you sure You can be objective? -After all, You did CREATE them.'

"I wonder how many people are claiming to be your messiah right now?"

"Any distinguishing 'PARSONAL' characteristics?"

"He really isn't bad, per se, but he is kind of a jerk."

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"I'm an agnostic now that I've started having self doubts."

A not-so-happy God, with the Humans, sticking an Eviction Notice to the Earth

'How come I always get the shoulder with the parrot?'

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

"Instead of Red Team and Blue Team, why don't we make it Good v. Evil?"

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

'Ok Preacher, here's the deal. You back off I back off, and everyone is happy...'

'I'm all tired out from creating - let's just use NATURAL selection from now on.'

Worst. God. Ever.

Corruption trial in the Vatican

"This is a little embarrassing to admit, but everything that happens happens for no real reason."

'No, please, go on. It's so refreshing to talk to someone with an entirely different point of view.'

"I think you made your mistake right at the beginning!"

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'

'Doesn't this 'chosen people' thing sound a little nepotistic?'

"Well, son, in a way, I suppose Jesus was a trust-fund baby."

"I stand corrected..."

'If we have everlasting life, what about entropy?'

Woman protesting to Free-Kirk pastor about a church organ

"Hey, this is a good bit- did I say that?"

'Oh, I believe in God -- I just think that he's overrated.'

"To find out if God exists let's ask an expert."