Ancient Law Aficionado Gifts

"You're sure you're not Hammurabi?"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"Have you been playing dice?"

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

Sphinx Comes Alive

"This is my client's videotaped deposition—please be considerate and rewind after viewing."

Violent Crime Statistics

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

Lady Justice.

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

"It's called 'Pizza maker scratching his knee.'"

"It's a long-term strategy to make them lazy and complacent first."

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

"Don't forget the screenplay."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."