Ancient Civilization Buff Pillows

"Bloody foreign architects!"

'The trouble with these pyramid schemes, is that the only ones who benefit are the guy who dream them up.'

What shoddy workmanship - this road was only built 300 years ago and it already has a pot hole!"

"Ha! I didn't become the mayor of Atlantis by listening to a bunch of pesky scientists."

I need a six-symbol word for "rare fruit." First symbol is Ankh, fourth is squiggly line. Early Crossword.

I read an article on Candorville.com about how we might not be the first advances civilization on earth. There's evident that mankind was far more advanced than we thought, but it was blown back into the stone age by some huge cataclysm. A lot of scientists disagree, but why else would mankind build 200 immense underground cities all around the world, if not to survive a cataclysm? I'm starting to think you just like saying the word cataclysm. I also read that we're cataclysmically overdue for a

1069 BC: Ancient Egyptians invent the loo roll.

'That's gonna be a big job, boss.'

"Now, there's something you don't see every day."

Tourists

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Cavemen Romantic Gesture

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

The Fall of Gnome

"I couldn't care less if being Homo Sapiens is the latest trend. While you're living in our cave, you better act like a true Neanderthal."

"Where do you think we are in the food chain right now?"

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

"When I said make it RIGHT, I meant correctly."

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

'Sigh! So that's what love is all about...'

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Humanities 101. I hear you're reading Greek plays in there. Yeah, it's a real Medea blitz!

Maybe the gods aren't angry. Maybe the gods are just yanking our chain.

"No, this is NOT a beta-test!"

"...it was believed that anyone who displeased it would meet with a terrible fate, which of course is complete nonsen..."

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

"Stanley, this is a historic moment. We've discovered the world's longest kiss. Guinness Book of Records here we come!"

What do you think about this "too big to fail" stuff?

'I think that our next door neighbor might have lived here.'

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

Litter Tray Stonehenge