Analogy Lover Gifts

"My asparagus on my allotment has exactly the same thing."

'Oh, Ben is a good man...like stem cells are good, but I am looking for embryonic stem cells.'

"Congratulations, Trumpism. It's ot often we initiate a new horseman."

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

E-Baying @ The Moon

'Due to government surveillance, is my allowance taxable?'

The creature from the trailer by the dried-up lagoon.

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

Little Red Riding Carpet

"There isn't a siege. We're all in line for the bouncy castle."

'Look, Bernie, all I'm saying is I think you're riding the new guy pretty hard.'

'Even More Disciples'

Vampire collects bottles of blood from his doorstep.

Harmon Silas, calculating the thousand words his picture is worth, wonders what do do with contractions.

"Helen. I think the dog wants to go out."

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

"Not that kind of hare, Rapunzel!"

Operation Chrome Dome.

Great Poets of Catalogdom

"Let's try it again. Hand over your wallet, and this time, don't try anything funny."

"Would someone dim the lights? I'm about to launch into the paranoid and conspiratorial portion of my report."

Missing Daylight: So dark. So cold.

"I loved your embarrassing personal essay in the 'Times.' "