American Highways Gifts

Route 666

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

"You must be the newly qualified driver."

YONDER...next 347 miles.

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

Through Traffic Keep Left/We're Through Traffic Keep Right

Caution: Construction workers standing around and drinking coffee.

Vacation Time: Hither, Thither, Yon.

Cars feeding at a gas tanker on the side of the road

Say speed

'Sue's troubles with the law began the day she bought that first motorbike.'

Make up your mind. Next exit 500 miles.

Jackson Pollock's brief career with the highway department

'At 11:35 it's the SLOW sign. At 11:39, the STOP sign. At 11:43 it's back to the SLOW sign. At 11:49 you break for lunch. At 1:00 it's the STOP sign...'

Man in car sees fallen sign on the hood of his car which says, CAUTION sign-holding road worker falls asleep.

Fast Lane. cars Like yours.

"We'd wanted to adopt for years, and then along came this absolutely adorable little roundabout."

"On your mark! Get set!"

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

Way to go

Speed limit 70mph and up.

NEXT EXIT Food & Drink Cafe...Open 24 hours: 'Hey! Here's the place we saw advertised on the freeway!'

"Uh-huh, I see... and how did you get along with the other adopted sections of this highway?"

'Most of all, I want a long-term highway bill.'

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.

A 'failed' brake check!

"I admire the way you avoided that radar trap."

"...Apparently we're responsible for snow removal on that stretch of highway we adopted."

"USA map"

'This baby can do zero to sixty in four seconds flat!!'

'I'm telling you, with the right moisturizer and lip balm you could avoid all of that chaffing.'

Some mistakenly think 'HOV Lane' means Hot Occupant Vehicles.

Truck scale to weigh the truck as well as a 'trucker scale' to weigh the driver

Abandon all hope,you who enter here.

'Get with it, buddy -- that mile of highway you adopted has snow all over it!'