America Buff Gifts

Trump Mess

Television Readers.

"And now here's Cathie with the hypothetical portion of the news."

'Thank heavens! For a minute there I thought it was the news!'

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Man: 'How cute. He must like the movement.' Cat: 'There are some challenging themes here but little or no dramatic resonance.'

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

"Always with the String Theory."

Junk art/ food/ tv/ music/ amusements/ novels/ views/ life.

Can't Touch This

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'Can't you at least wait until half time?!'

Tunnel of TV

Coming up: Bush and Kerry will debate on 'saturday night live'...and whoever gets the most laughs will be the winner.'

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

Homo Zapiens

President S Grant's Proposed Civil Service Reform not to the Taste of Certain Senators

'Are you kidding, Billy? We climbed all the way up Everest and you forgot the freaking sleds?!'

"If I were you, I wouldn't change the channel!"

"If you're such a great Doctor, how come you're not on Chicargo hope or ER?"

Uncle Sam and Democracy

With no clear winner, the debate ended in a tie breaker.

'You should know better than to switch channels during a Garfield special.'

'Have you any idea just how little this is worth?'

Woman and TV.

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

TV and cleaner