Ambitious Parent Gifts

Money And Prestige

'I have her registered in a pre-med nursery program.'

"All my children have the potential I never could afford."

Be A Doctor

"Do you want to play doctorate?"

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

A very young man being hired as a groom.

"I will always cheer you on, but I will never 'Woo-hoo!' you."

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

'As you can see, it's a boy and he seems to be doing just fine.'

"He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up."

'When I grow up I want to join the SWAT team!'

'I want to give my children all the things I never had. Then move in with them.'

"I'd put his name down for Eton if I could spell it!"

'It just says strange things happened after she ate the wafers. It doesn't mention their street value.'

"Look Daddy, at least the poor economy hasn't affected the Tooth Fairy yet!"

"Someday, I'm gonna be president of the United States."

"Did you ever have that baby you wanted so much?"

Take your Daughter to Word Day

'If hired, where do you see yourself with the company in five years?'

'I'm sorry Mrs Jones, but according to these results your womb is extremely inhospitable, and your husband's sperm is gay.'

'You read him Jack and the Beanstalk again, didn't you?'

'The great stampedes are over, son. All you can hope for today is an occasional goring.'

"Mom, there's a monster under my bed. Can we keep it?"

"Larry and Phil aren't sure what they want to do, but Michael is interested in show business."

"Let's face it Simkins, the only way you'll ever get to medical school is by donating your body to science."

Mother Love is Without Logic

'Good morning, Dad, It's your turn to be the cowboys!'

'That's not the image I wanted to leave him with.'

"We need to hurry to your next extracurricular activity before the void of my unfulfilled ambitions catches up."

"Just wait 'til I've read this book."

Kangaroo moms chatting in the rain.

Male and Female doors to IVF clinic

". . . and this little piggy said 'to heck with it. Let's all go down to the Market Tavern!'"

"Delia, I’d like you to meet one of my oldest and dearest friends."