Amateur Musician Pillows

Spring Cleaning

'And now, please stand and join us as complete amateur butchers our national anthem.'

"Hurry up, I'm hungry."

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

"Darling, I never realised how talented you weren't!"

When Tia Carmen says... "A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner" it means "I can fix it with a hammer."

"Those are the lyrics? How embarrassing—I've been singing it wrong this whole time."

"If there is no more American Idol what am I going to do to become famous?"

Young lady telling a young man he is not singing low enough.

"Still life with fruit and terribly drawn fish"

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

'People say I don't listen to other's opinions. That's not true, is it Binky?'

Man having picture of caught fish sees that cat has eaten it.

Gracie tries to invent a shrinking spray and squirts Baldo with it.

"Keep it up Kevin, you're really improving."

'I'll put one end of the hose in your pool...you take the other end outside...gravity will create a siphon and drain the water with no mess.'

"He sings for charity. He has to. Nobody offers to pay him."

"That' was great - let's run though that again."

'Billy, how many times have I told you to get your thumb out of your mouth? Betty, for heaven's sake, brush your hair out of your eyes.' 'An annoying auto-focus camera.'

"I got the blues in the mornin', I got the blues at night..."

'That wasn't the home movie. That was the trailer.'

Craft A Yummy, Grammable Cocktail.

"The only thing that can save it now is a really bad glee club!!"

"All this just to take a selfy!"

Open Mic Night

A minister forgetfully slipping into his other role as a photographer

Workaholic and alcoholic

"No more for me, thanks - I have to denigrate his driving."

"The technique is good, but somehow I feel that the artist didn't take enough time observing the subject."

"A new study reveals this is ACTUALLY what you've been chasing."