Alternative Therapy Skeptic Pillows

Acupuncture darts.

"He said he couldn't help me unless I hurt all over."

New Age Auto Repair

"I'm sensing a nostalgia for when your mother rubbed butter on them."

Self help acupuncture

"All I take anymore is mushrooms for my anxiety, ketamine for my depression, and ibuprofen for the goblins constantly eating my feet."

"I'm putting you on country music."

'I have to admit I was skeptical at first, but their hooves are magical, Magical, I say!'

Low self esteem workshop - 'You missed it. It finished two hours ago, you useless pillock.'

We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of spiritual and artistic therapies which is why we've developed 'megazymol' to enhance the experience!

'2 chocolate truffles in the morning and 2 in the evening should cure your broken heart,,,'

A shrink charges $200 an hour, but double chocolate layer cake is only $19.95.

"I don't think this is doing me any good."

Flo figured that since she was using medical marijuana during chemo, she might as well go hippy retro.

'Extreme acupuncture.'

"He went to an alternative therapy seminar to find ways of reducing his stress levels..."

Therapy Group For Those Who Are Afraid of Therapy Groups

'Got anything for a headache?'

'If that doesn't work, nothing will.'

"Sorry. No refunds."

"I used to think that hypnotherapy was a pseudo-science but Phil has convinced me otherwise."

'I was in the circus before I took up acupuncture.'

New Age Anatomy...

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

"We're making exiting advances in alternative car care."

'Therapy and medications are not the only options for your obsessive behavior.'

2013: psychoanalysis is formally declared a scam.

'I'm not coming here again Doctor Melrose. I'd rather talk to my plants.'

Acupunture Clinic opens next to a Ballon Animal shop.

Following several health insurance denials of coverage, Thelma finally resolves to entrust her hubby's seasonal depression to the gentle alternative process by psychotherapist Hans-Georg Stumke.

"Mr. Dinsdale - come back!"

'I'm not paying $200 per hour for therapy, so you must be the one who's nuts.'

"It appears the pain is caused by your acupuncture treatments."

'Relaxing with accupressure is easy. Press here, here, here and here, and order take-out.'