Allergy Sufferer's Chuckle Pillows

'Noah's wife is allergic to cats.'

"Is it just me, or is the pollen particularly bad this year?"

"His tests show he has a latex allergy."

'I just came back from the allergist. I'm allergic to life.'

'You should have thought about your allergies before you built the ark.'

An allergist sneezing

Man sneezes and blows flowers out of painting.

'You see, I'm allergic to dog dander....'

"The surgery went well. You'll be issued a 'Contains No Nuts' card upon discharge."

"The tests came back positive. You're H2O intolerant."

"How Lovely. You brought me pollen."

"So, little Andy is a lawyer now!"

"The good news is you only have an allergy. The bad news is you're allergic to pollen."

"So, it's Gluten free, lactose free and meat free. How does it taste?"

"How could they possibly know it's gluten-free, low gi. . . ?"

You're going to give me a hay fever shot? Shouldn't I be getting an anti hay fever shot?

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."

The sounds of spring.

That's right: Not only are we 'Man's best friend', but a lot of people are allergic to cats...

"Modern art?"

Asthma cats

'Bless you!'

"Ok, tough guy, let's see if you can take the unbearable tickle of your runny nose with the facial tissues just out of reach."

'No, you should not get ready to ascend the throne. It's just a head cold.'

'Now, don't panic, but I'd like you to take off all your clothes so we can burn them.'

'Oh, it's not that I don't like humans, it's just my allergies.'

Pollen's Side of the Story

'Strawberries give me the hives. How about an apple?'

"This is a nasty rash. It's either a food allergy to curds and whey or contact dermatitis from the tuffet"

'I only sneezed because I have hay fever.'

'I don't want to catch whatever the heck you've got.'

Acupuncture

'Tony is allergic to the cat.'

'Bless you.'

"Severe lactose intolerance - he can't even look at a cow."