Alchemy Enthusiast Gifts

"I know this is all nonsense , but that's the paradigm I'm stuck with."

'Now all this stuff will finally begin to pay for itself - here's the formula for transmuting lead into gold.'

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

"Unfortunately this lab is funded only by as much gold as we can make from lead."

'My goodness, it IS Gold! I'm so glad you were there to record all the experimental steps and settings...'

'Unfortunately this lab is funded only by as much gold as we can make from lead.'

"He's done it your majesty! He's turned lead into a screenplay!"

'...based on the premise that 6X3=47...'

Alchemist - name and ate unknown: 'At the Transylvania Conference, everyone was claiming to have the philosopher's stone. As chair of the select committee on turning lead into gold, I expect to have conclusive report within a decade or two.'

'I'm trying to transmute lead into a combustible fuel that will produce no smoke.' 'Turning it into gold will be easier.'

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

"After all these years, I'm sure of only one thing: when I heat the liquid, it boils."

"Science fraud? What do I do that isn't science fraud?"

"He has a little place in the basement where he's trying to transmute amethysts into antibiotics."

"The lab boys figured out how to change lead into gold. Now your job is to corner the lead market."

"How is it that someone who reads all the Harry Potter books still doesn't know the magic word?"

Toadstools

Desert Island BBQ

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

You do know it's Harry Potter who's real and JK Rowling is just one of his spells?

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

Broomstick crash.

"I said slime."

100% carbon neutral

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

"I can't believe he brought her."

Rocking Witches.

"I just need help getting the pit out."

'One more curse out of you, young man, and it's right down to the principal's office.'

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

"It's probably just seasonal."

Rocket and Witch Race

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

Kiddies Menu for Witches