Alchemy Enthusiast T-Shirts

"I know this is all nonsense , but that's the paradigm I'm stuck with."

'Now all this stuff will finally begin to pay for itself - here's the formula for transmuting lead into gold.'

'I'm trying to turn gold into gasoline.'

"Unfortunately this lab is funded only by as much gold as we can make from lead."

'My goodness, it IS Gold! I'm so glad you were there to record all the experimental steps and settings...'

'Unfortunately this lab is funded only by as much gold as we can make from lead.'

"He's done it your majesty! He's turned lead into a screenplay!"

'...based on the premise that 6X3=47...'

Alchemist - name and ate unknown: 'At the Transylvania Conference, everyone was claiming to have the philosopher's stone. As chair of the select committee on turning lead into gold, I expect to have conclusive report within a decade or two.'

'I'm trying to transmute lead into a combustible fuel that will produce no smoke.' 'Turning it into gold will be easier.'

'But why do you want to transmute asparagus into cotton?'

"After all these years, I'm sure of only one thing: when I heat the liquid, it boils."

"Science fraud? What do I do that isn't science fraud?"

"He has a little place in the basement where he's trying to transmute amethysts into antibiotics."

"The lab boys figured out how to change lead into gold. Now your job is to corner the lead market."

Toadstools

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

Desert Island BBQ

You do know it's Harry Potter who's real and JK Rowling is just one of his spells?

"I said slime."

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

100% carbon neutral

Rocking Witches.

"I can't believe he brought her."

Broomstick crash.

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

"Then, after college, I joined the navy. Wait, I think I hear him coming."

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

"I just need help getting the pit out."

Kiddies Menu for Witches

"It's probably just seasonal."

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

You said you wanted beer with hops !

Rocket and Witch Race