Agribusiness Innovator Gifts

You just plant the seed, water it, and when it grows, you eat it --- I call it "agribusiness."

"A wet winter, but we're making the best of it."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

'The guy in the scarecrow shop promised me that nothing scares crows better than the 'Giant Fox XR50'.'

"I'm now too old to produce milk, and I can't afford to retire as yet, so I've had to diversify..."

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

Some genetically engineered pig

"He's a quick learner."

"Looks promising. I just hope you aren't leading us down the garden path again."

'I'm pretty sure this means the price has finally hit bottom.'

'I don't know if she's gonna be much good. I don't think she's even registered.'

A Protractor.

'These were developed in the 1980s - they're a heritage genetically modified variety.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

“UKRAINE FARM LAND PICK YOUR OWN”

It's a little known fact that Einstein quit science and went into the cattle business.

Speculators and Food Production

"Farmers are always complaining about the amount of paperwork that Europe generates...but if you use your imagination then you can turn it to your advantage!"

Yup, I like these self-driving cattle. Google.

I was the barn cat until the farm went corporate.

"I'm taking out two acres of pecan trees and putting in a fifteen-thousand-square-foot colonic-irrigation facility."

"To be fair, you each must lose 50 pounds..."

SOIL BANK: 'Loam dept...clay, sand & gravel'.

Drought ruined corn crop.

"Is your business picking up?"

"First I used one herbicide, then another, then it got out of hand."

'I think Willis has gone overboard with his 'agribusiness' image.'

'This is gonna sound crazy, but I've got an idea.'

"Basic economics - sometimes the parts are worth more than the whole."

"I've never seen the corn this bad."

After losing cancer lawsuit, Bayer turns Monsanto into an arms factory.

"Profits are up since moving to battery hens!"