Agrarian Aficionado Gifts

No guessed needed to work out what her favourite hobby is?

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

'Life is great' down on the farm.

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

Country Bumpkin.

Goat about goat: 'He's no longer gruff since he's been on Prozac.'

'Trickle or Spray!?'

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

"They’re real."

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

Okay, dig that one up!

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

"Can I call you back? I've got a situation here."

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

Pull the udder one

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'Can he come out and play?'

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

"If anything else, it beats bending over!"

Police Cow!

A giant glass of red wine

'Shuck me.'

Cow and Milk

"And to my son Frank, I leave my greenhouse in the country."

Sorry, I only eat organic, fair-trade, shade-grown, biodynamic, raw dirt.

The worm that churned!

"Can you keep a secret?"

Runner Bean...

I've located your problem, luv!

"It's a scientific breakthrough! This seed will produce less corn...thus driving up the price!"

'I am the ghost of Christmas future...with fries!'