Agriculture Aficionado Gifts

"Can you keep a secret?"

'The traffic wardens around here are absolute b**tards.'

'Bovine Palpation'

Corn Silo / Wheat Silo / Missile Silo

"Don't panic Daisy dear. You can relax your buttocks, it's not the vet, it's the chimney sweep."

'How do those pants fit with five teats?' 'Like a glove.'

'Ok..Ok...I'm putting the lawnmower back in the shed!'

"I'm not sure what we're seeing but I think it's some kind of antique milking machine."

'The bull's still alive and well, Mr. Fillimond, unfortunately he's not grazing in your field.'

'Classes of Farmer and how they differ'

Bird seed.

'It used to be a dairy farm, but now the milk produces therapeutic proteins, and the eggs contain antibiotics.'

"Will you be posting this on ewe tube?"

America insists that Brazil and Europe plant G.M crops - 'Unfortunately Sir, the Europeans are still resisting Monsanto's advances...'

'You know what these things are worth in the states?'

'No, I'm NOT a monster chicken! I'm a genetically modified carrot.'

Drought Dragon

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

'Boy - when they say don't miss a payment,they mean it.'

"I'm part Irish on my mother's side."

'Well, no, I wouldn't say I'm a mad cow, although Farmer Brown does get on my nerves once in a while!'

Effective farming.

'Getting these old cows gastric bypass surgery cost too much money Marge.We're gonna lose the farm for sure now!'

Farmers' Market

'STOP dad! I found Kitty.'

Prize winning pig and farmer

'As a Potato & a Farmer he has a unique perspective on the GM issue.'

Farm Produce - Sweet Corn Potatoes Rocks

'I thought you said you'd done this before.'

"I have four stomachs and one of them always seems to be hungry.''

In Case of Cash-Flow Emergency Break Glass.

'George, the silo salesman is here.'

Okay, dig that one up!

"I reckon we've gone too far accommodating them townies."

"Can I call you back? I've got a situation here."