Age-defying Antics Pillows

"I cranked up the dose a tad. Why should kids have all the fun?"

A new you. 'First, you've got to stop lying about you age.' It didn't start off well.

A woman is as young as she feels like admitting to.

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

The Woodstock Medical-Emergency Tent - 1994

'I think you should seek treatment for that Lego block obsession of yours!'

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin surfing Mendocino. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore?"

'It wasn't premeditated.

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

Pensioners run riot on mobility scooters.

'Grownups are stupid! How can you be good and have fun?'

'Listen Mabel, you are 70, I am 75 and we have known each other since junior school. It's pure wishful thinking on your part if you claim I am 'grooming' you...'

'It was self-defense - the clock struck first.'

'Believe me, sweetie, if I thought the 'Wrinkle Out' setting on the clothes dryer would work...'

The Queen of Static Electricity: 'Boring Rainy Day Sitting Area.'

Still hip, but not much hop.

"Without a doubt... the first sixty!"

"I never thought you'd live to be 90 either. By the way, you're only 67."

"If I become 'Born again', can I fudge a bit on my age?"

"Don't worry about being in your 40's - before you know it, you'll be in your 50's!"

'You know you're 40 when...'

"In your case we’ll begin the facelift with an incision behind your right ear and extend it into the waiting room."

"I'm starting to look old."

That's a silly question. What does it LOOK like I'm doing?'

"My dad really went ballistic! I'm not grounded...I'm under house arrest!"

"I know that you've always enoyed your work."

Getting older isn't the same as growing up.

'I don't eat organic foods. At my age I can use all the preservatives I can get.'

Playpen Jailbreak.

'Mum, you just HAVE to stop lying about your age, otherwise everyone will think that you are younger than me!'

"It's father, doctor, he's creaking badly."

'To absent teeth.'