Aftershave Aficionados Pillows

'So what's your complaint? '

Lesser known greek gods,

Couples Massage: "Did you remember the body oil?"

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

Sheep In Curlers

"Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?"

'I'm going to have to cut it - Daddy is complaining about the shampoo bill again.'

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

"I tried that new detangling shampoo."

'Honey, these split ends look terrible! What kind of shampoo have you been using?'

"You never finish your screenplay, but you do achieve fuller, thicker hair."

"Wow! I can feel it tingle so it must be getting rid of my dandruff!"

'I'm not happy with my 'honey and lilac' shampoo.'

'Honey, I need some money for a facial: I need to look my best with all these photo safaris around...'

"You mean to say you haven't even put your face on yet?"

Cosmetics keep men from reading between the lines.

'Do you have a perfume that will make me smell thinner?'

"It's a remarkable find...evidence of human habitation that dates to ancient history!"

"I washed it last night- now I can't do a damn thing with it!"

"Is your spouse bad at babying you when you're sick?"

"May be I should part my hair on the right."

'Isn't he a little young for sideburns?'

"...with the Botox injections... I never lose at poker."

"Wash and Quo"

"With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!"

In space, no-one can hear you scream.

Shampoo 'Slaphead and Shoulders'

Friendly sports arguments with barbers.

Tsunami for fleas

"What time does the afterparty start?"

"I don't care if you have a heavy date...I'll thank you to stay out of my aftershave!"