Affluent Lifestyle Dreamer T-Shirts

"He's very well off. He's got all the quantities I admire."

'Okay, lifestyles of the rich and famouse, start that motor and get us into some shade.'

"I know by outward standard I'm successful, but a voice inside my head keeps saying, 'Where's your private plane?"

'Can anybody here separate their fingers and if so will you pour?'

Every year, the poodleboys gather to test their skills in the Beverly Kills Rodeo Championships.

'Enough about your losing portfolio. Let me tell you about my vacation home in the Hamptons...'

"Miss Penny to inquire about the tardiness of evening kibble."

'My mutual funds went through the roof! I no longer need to be your sidekick!'

"Didn't I tell you that if I kicked up a fuss they'd move us to business class"

'I looked into their eyes before I shot them, with my high-powered rifle, from half a mile away.'

"I want to be a footballer's wife."

'Ever think that if you make another billion you'll be happy, and then you do, but you're not?'

What is possible...

"Good news, your yacht club membership has arrived!"

'I know I just started working here, but is there any way I could get a company car, a membership to a country club and use of the corporate jet? This would greatly enhance my performance in the mail room.'

'When I first planned my retirement it was an ocean going 7 berth yacht with jacuzzi and helipad.'

Unnecessary Surgery

"I guess I want what everyone wants - a billion dollars for being a jerk."

"Hey, and I hear congrats are in order for earning 'Super Elite' status in elevator miles!"

Are you crazy? ... You make 10 million dollars a year and you want to know the meaning of life?

Lifestyles of the rich and swinish.

The rivalry between the Hamptons and Cape Code spills over.

'It's a midlife crisis - he doesn't know anyone with a vacation home that he can mooch off.'

"You don't have to spend a lot of money to have a good time?"

'Is this business class?'

You writers must have an easy life, I've often thought I'd have a bash myself if I had a bit of spare time.

huntsman on horseback

Hi, I'm a taxman...

"I'm pulling down nearly six figures these days. Five, to be exact."

God, I hate riding the bus. Sometimes I wish that a limo would pick me up instead. Then I lower my standards and wish for an Uber car. Then it's a cab. I now realize I'd settle for a bicycle. Bus.

Wealthy Peacocks.

"I just hope you find a man to take you away from all of this."

Posh lady feeding the birds in the park via a butler

"Ugh. Nepo puppy."

"I'll be on Fifth Avenue, pressing my cold little nose wistfully against shop windows."