Affectionate Advisor Pillows

"The 'death knell for my creative aspirations'? Not at all! You're my little ray of sunshine! Also... you shouldn't read other people's text messages."

Paint pots in love

Love

"I don’t know how many ways I can explain it. One morning you’ll just wake up and know that you’re in love."

"I love it when your eyes blaze like that; you remind me of Moses."

A man reads a book called 'Opening Lines' while a woman reads a book called 'Brush Offs'.

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

Love for the family

"Sure, pat down strangers all day, but I ask for one little hug..."

'There are signs of improvement but I wouldn't order Christmas cards with both your names on them.'

'John, this is where you should declare your underlying love and tell Miriam she's the wind beneath your wings...'

"I know where we stand right now, Dr. Heisenberg, but where are we going?"

'Come now - surely we can draw up this pre-nuptial agreement amicably.'

"I know you're angry when you cross your arms."

'I think I've spotted our problem.' (too many consultants)

'My advice to a first year teacher is to teach from the heart, not only from the book.'

Miss Lonelyhearts Advice to the Lovelorn

Valentine's Day Kiss

'Girls! I won't understand them if I live to be six.'

'What I like most about my mom is that she always supersizes her hugs.'

'It feels great now, but you will see when it's pulled out.'

"Honey! Remember when we first met and you used to nibble my ear?"

'I need a commitment. I don't want to just hang out with you.'

'Always with the hugs! Would it kill you to kiss me once in a while?'

"I was being myself like you advised. That's when she dumped me!"

"Couples therapy is not 'going out.' Henry!"

'Maybe all I really need is a hug.'

My valentine

Hugs.

'You got something against bear hugs?'

'Is your girlfriend still playing hard-to-get?', 'No -- now she's playing keep-away.'

Grandmother's house has sign 'Kids spoiled while U wait.'

'She agreed to marry me, but she has to marry three other guys first.'

'He gets very defensive.'

"So, Beatriz...how are things with you and your boyfriend?"