Affection Seekers T-Shirts

"Behind every great man is an equally great woman starved for affection."

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

Sitting in a tree

"If you lied about where you are from, what else have you lied about?"

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

Pyjama party

Baker Romance

"We're here to experience pleasure."

Speed Dating.

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

Manners And Customs Of Ye Englishe: A Pic-Nic

'Bearing in mind I'm a man of few words - how much?'

Man browsing books see couple kissing in romance section of book store.

"Well, I finally figured out why we were going to the vet so often for check ups! He finally plucked up the courage to ask her out!"

"When it comes to loving someone, I never seem to get it right."

The Wishing Well

"Well, I've come this close to asking out Sylvia Sanchez. But I'm just an average guy! Nothing about me says 'I'm cool! Look at me!'"

"Why so grim, handsome?"

Exposed Intimacy Safety Vulnerability Hidden Enmity

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

'Telephone call for Mr. Right!'

"This could be the marriage all our other marriages were for!"

Tongue in the ear...

Horny Nanny Seeks Lonely Goat Herd.

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

'Marriage? With all your pre-existing conditions Reggie, my HMO would never approve of you'

'You've got us backward. I'm Vinnie, and my short and subtle brother is Vignette.'