Advertising Lecturer Gifts

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'How fast can you hype?'

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

'We want everyone to remember our name.'

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

The Solar System (after deregulation)

What can I do? He says it's his thinking cap.

Create some buzz!

If nobody had invented graphics

Creative department

'Gentlemen, we need a slogan!'

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

"Technically he's a zombie but we'll market him as a hybrid."

"By the end of next week, these fads such as social media, automobiles and making fire will all be over."

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

Important Food Groups

Jewellery Shop: Disposable income spoken here.

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'We've re-branded.'

Direct Marketing...

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

"May I skip the usual Show & Tell and try to hustle some merch?"

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

The bad news is our boxer shorts are still bursting into flames. The good news is our brand recognition is through the roof

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

A balloon seller is selling thought bubble balloons

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

"I go that extra mile!"

'Now I know why they threw in the printer for free. It's only got a resolution of one dot per 8 12 inches.'

At the mobile tracking test lab.

The Corner Of Ogden And Nash: Candy is Daddy/Liquor is Quicker

"The news is so fake, the ads are beginning to look honest."