Advertising Adventurer Gifts

"Remember, Mort: Courage isn't the absence of fear. Courage is remaining media-savvy in the face of fear!"

"My mommy suggested I try a different advertising approach."

'Looks like another bad PR week for the company. The whole media team got burned in our last email blast."

'We've got the top terrorist in the world to endorse our cereal.'

'You know there may be something in this idea of promoting the firm in shops!'

"Starting at a new agency can be overwhelming. Let me show you around."

"This is a great spot to practice mighty roars son..."

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

World Tour.

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

'Some of these trees have been here for 2000 years... and they still can't talk. Man, we're awesome!'

"Draw your own path."

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

'Arf! Arf!'

'This is my kind of place. You knock bottles off a table with a baseball and get a prize instead of time-out!'

"Tonight we dine with the devil. But tomorrow we really need to finish what's left in the fridge."

'It's creative as hell! Now that you've got that out of your system, give me a campaign that will sell.'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

"His father came from a family of climbers."

"Hel-l-l-o-o-o-o Summer!"

Gerald Ratner's return

"Hey! I can see the Empire State Building!"

Can I have a look at the map?

"The problem is that our ads have either been too Jewish or not Jewish enough."

"On the bright side, Dear, your jump looked great right up until the landing!"

'Sometimes I wish I had never sold my camels!'

Selfie of the Golden Hinde

Lost

As Seen Watching TV

Danger: Falling animals