Adulting Pro Gifts

"Yeah, I'm at that awkward age where all my friends are starting families, or rehab."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

"I can't get used to being a grownup."

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

"Yeah, you could say I've got mother issues....she told me I have to move out!"

"My parents said that until I find a job and move out they will not recognize me as a sentient being."

Three kids in a trench coat, twenty years later.

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

The GODFATHER Ride 25¢

'Where Are They Now?'

'Our tabby was pre-approved for a credit card!'

"Sorry. I'm out of leprecondoms."

"RAF Recruitment Waiting Room."

"On my taxes, I claimed my inner child as a dependent."

I couldn't resist his pickup line. He said he had a job.

"So, next week, if it's okay with our wives, wanna have another playdate?"

"I thought I put on my 'big boy' pants this morning but apparently they were my 'fire me' pants."

'I want to go out of town so that I can become a fully independent person, but near enough so that I can bring my laundry home.'

"I just don't know what to do with myself in that long stretch after college but before social security."

'At first his nose ring irritated me, but then I made him tie a string to it. Now I can lead him around.'

Adult Book Store. Leaving home. Finding a Job. Getting Married. Buying a House. Raising Kids. Living with Stress.

"The good news is, my son is a potential winner, bad news, I'm still buying his lottery tickets."

"Awake and doing great"

Other People

"If being normal is so natural.....why is it such a strain?"

How to injury yourself as an adult

Secrets of Adulthood.

Small Talk

Beware... the Piñata of Adulthood

"This can't be happening! I'm supposed to be a cool adult! At least I bet I have a cool car!"

"With finances the way they are we had to give up the idea of a family holiday this year."

The singles bar...

"I know it hurts, Henry, but sooner of later everybody has to condo the home he grew up in."

"I have to go to school, then get a job, and then pay for my own stuff. Life is so unfair!"