Adult Humor Lovers Gifts

Santa left a six pack and cookies.

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Police Feline Unit

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Faster, Georges, faster!

Cariactures

Speed Dating for Turtles

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

Do Not Resuscitate

Selling lemon latt�

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

'Cannonball!'