Adult Humor Fans Gifts

A Little Fun.

"Dress me up! I feel so naked!!!"

Wet T-shirt Nite

Do Not Touch

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

"So, tell me a little bit more about this house training you mention on your CV."

'Wow, the field really is a frozen tundra!'

'It's a difficult job, he needed a bigger than average 'stress ball'.'

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

"Well, I'm thinking about boarding school. Though I'm not sure they accept adults."

"They're comfortable."

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

"She wishes to range free!"

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

Man enters a palm reading establishment carrying a tropical plant.

"Yeah, I don't like this part either."

'I really wish you guys would knock that off.'

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

A Mix Up Between the Buggy and Lawn Mower.

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

"...And that's how to translate honey into money."

'We found you in a cabbage!'

How Amazon was invented

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

"Better start moving towards shelter: the weather forecast is for rain this afternoon..."

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

King on the toilet whilst jester laughs because the toilet paper is out of reach.