Adapting To Dietary Needs Gifts

'I'm on a fixed income, so these free offers are most welcome.'

"I envy you, but my dietary requirements make it difficult for me to travel..."

"It's completely normal for someone your age to develop a taste for butterscotch."

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

"Do you see what you are doing to your mother?"

'As it's your birthday, I think I'll have a pudding.'

'Do you have a traditional Christmas dinner, but for a lacto-vegan fruitarian?'

"Mom says I should eat differnt colored foods. I'll have a pizza with jelly beans."

"No, we don't sell gluten-free gluten."

'The health plate is low in sodium, cholesterol, and sugar -- the downside is that it's high in styrofoam.'

'I know why Max has suddenly turned vegetarian: His new girlfriend is a Fruit-Bat...'

"Sure makes a change from New York!"

Lockdown Signpost

"You're leaving?" "Yeah, today's kids are so demanding so I've decided to move to a gluten-free, lactose-free, nut-free, sugar-free neighborhood."

The Gluten is Free. RUN!

'Whatever diet they're on, tell them what they ordered is perfect for them.'

'I'm coping.'

"None of our items are gluten-free, but they are prepared by people who are."

"Run! It's Armagluten!"

"Y' know, a GOOD host would provide a lactose-free option!"

"You're in New York City now. You gotta lose the southern hospitality if you truly want to fit in."

"My lab tests are in. I'm lactose intolerant."

"One gluten-free, lactose-free, low carb pizza."

"Now Harold, you know those always give you heartburn."

"I'm giving up chocolate for lent."

"Sorry, babe, this ain't gonna work out. I'm lactose intolerant."

Currently, I can only offer takeout service.

'Well, since you're so picky: Why don't you choose the restaurant'

I'll trade you a gluten-Free Sandwich for lactose-free milk.

Gluten-free area.

'The only problem being a Beefeater is that I'm a vegetarian.'

And what would you recommend for a lapsed vegan?

If we lost all electrical power like India did...

'Do you have a traditional lacto-vegan Christmas dinner?'

"I asked for something gluten-free, dairy-free and meat-free and he brought me a glass of water."