Ad Humor Enthusiast Pillows

Yeah, your rates are very good, but your ads on TV just aren't funny enough

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

'Which sounds better: 'now with MORE XZ100' or 'now with LESS XZ100'?'

"I suppose you think that's funny."

As Seen Watching TV

"And now a word from our sponsors...ratings."

"Remember, you're selling home appliances, so look more ... dishwashery."

'It began as The Great American Novel...but it finally sold as an infomercial.'

Palm Reading

'This unexpectedly concludes tonight's program -- the sponsor bailed out.'

"We're ready to give the verdict....after the commercial break."

"Here's one - 'Few-bricks-short-of-a-load seeks One-our-out-of-the-water.'."

Marv's Preowned Vehicles...That new car smell can kill you! - Buy Used!

"Can you believe they're watching the same back-to-school ad?"

'He doesn't get the jokes - he just laughs at the F-words.'

"I said 'blow job' not 'blow chunks'."

Business gothic.

Sex shop headache pills...

Rudolph Red Light District

"Ooh, this one sounds interesting, 'Single, vegetarian, bulbous, with moves like a lava lamp'."

COUNCIL OF ECONOMIC ADVISORS, 'Have we tried product placement?'

'Thank you for picking me as your ATM machine...but before I dispense your money, here's a word from Ed's Bar & Grill...'

'I'd like you to come up with a catchy jingle that'll give people a headache everytime it's played.'

"I even had commercials in my dream last night."

It's the perfect advertising image of marital bliss. All we need is the disclaimer 'PROFESSIONAL ACTORS - DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME.'

"Now just say the first thing that comes into your mind."

"Alternatively we could make them all sexy."

'I can't identify with any brand emotionally!'

SWM highway patrolman in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your motorcycle.

McCooties, Gold, & Jibbs.

'We're making the package 10% smaller.'

Bottleopener.

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

' I don't care if their ad says they stand behind every bed they sell, I want him out of here...'